I watch crappy movies so you don't have to.

Thursday, April 16, 2015

Movie Review For April 17, 2015: PAUL BLART: MALL COP 2, MONKEY KINGDOM, and UNFRIENDED

Rated: PG
Stars: Kevin James, Raini Rodriguez
Plot: Paul Blart heads to Las Vegas for a vacation, but being a security guard is a full-time job.

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD

I can't begin to tell you how excited I was for this movie to finally be released. Not because I wanted to see it, but because I've now seen the trailer about 150 times. Finally I can move on.

If you saw the original PAUL BLART MALL COP, just stop now and be happy. PBMC2 is nothing more than a rehash of the same jokes in the original film, but this movie has less heart and less drama.

There are a few very funny moments, but not enough to make it worth spending theater ticket prices to see it. On top of that, the plot is paper thin, the motivation for the bad guys is ridiculously weak, the love interest makes no sense at all, and there isn't even a decent twist to keep you guessing.

This is one of those films where the trailer is not only better than the actual movie, but you see all you need to know in the trailer.

Save your money on this one and we will all hope that the other cop comedies coming out this summer will be better than this.

Rated: R
Stars: Shelley Hennig, Jacob Wysocki, Renee Olstead, Will Peltz, Moses Jacob Storm
Plot: A group of friends are haunted by an evil spirit while they Skype with each other

Clint Says: Don't even bother

This may be the lamest excuse for a horror movie I have ever seen. And that is saying something. But one of the reasons I love movies so much is because everyone has their own opinions and taste. As I was walking out of the theater positive I had just witnessed on of the worst movies of 2015, I saw a fellow movie reviewer and friend and asked him what he thought. He said, "It was brilliant! One of the move unique films I've ever seen." It's fascinating how two people can see the same thing in two completely different ways.

I will say that the premise is quite intriguing, but the execution is lacking greatly. Clocking in at only 82 minutes, this film is mercifully short, but it could have been 20 minutes shorter and still accomplished the same thing. It's slow, boring, barely dramatic and even less scary than it is dramatic.

The actors, for the most part, do a fine job in their roles. But there is only so much a person can handle when it comes to six teens screaming at each other on Skype. It was like I had entered the third level of Whiny People Hell.

Honestly, I think the only person in our theater that was even the slightest bit scared was a toddler. (Side note: What kind of idiot brings a toddler to an R-rated horror flick?!) And even that kid only cried twice.

Rated: G
Stars: Tina Fey
Plot: The story of a young monkey and mother trying to survive in ancient ruins in South Asia

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD

These DisneyNature films are always very well done and interesting and MONKEY KINGDOM is no exception, but like the others, there isn't anything in the movie that makes it so compelling that you have to see it in theaters. You will get the same effect and joy by watching this in your own living room four months from now that you would get by seeing it this weekend.

Really, the only reason to see it in theaters is because part of the ticket sales go to helping the monkeys survive. But if that is really something that concerns you, then just donate the full price of a ticket and then wait for the DVD.

As with most DisneyNature films, make sure you stick around through the credits. they show the camera crews working closely with the animals. To me it is the most intriguing part of the whole movie.

This film is safe and enjoyable for the whole family, so if you are looking for an outing this would be a good choice. Just don't expect your kids to walk out of it like they had just seen FROZEN.

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