I watch crappy movies so you don't have to.

Tuesday, December 22, 2015


Rated: R
Release Date: December 23, 2015
Director: Adam McKay
Stars: Steve Carell, Christian Bale, Ryan Gosling, Brad Pitt
Plot: A group of financial geniuses bet against the housing market in 2008 and win big

Clint Says: Drop everything and go see this movie now

This is easily one of the best films of the year and should be the front runner for Best Comedy as well as many of the Best Supporting Actor nominations. It may even see nominations for Screenplay and Director.

When you hear that this is a 2-plus hour movie about the housing crash of 2008 you would think that it would be the most boring, slow-moving film, but it is actually very exciting and enthralling from beginning to end. The way they deliver the boring information is done in such a unique and fun way that you almost can’t help but be happy to be learning about lame economic terms.

Steve Carell and Christian Bale give outstanding performances. And the cameos are almost the best part of the movie.

I highly recommend seeing it. 

Rated: R
Release Date: December 23, 2015
Director: Andrew Haigh
Stars: Charlotte Rampling, Tom Courtenay
Plot: A couple has to deal with news from the past during the week of their 45th wedding anniversary

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD

Charlotte Rampling and Tom Courtenay give outstanding, possibly award-worthy performances in this rather boring and slow film. 

The premise behind the movie is highly intriguing, but the execution is lacking and the film never gets into the meat of the issue or the payoff. The conflict is mild at best and the stakes are almost non-existent. 

This movie has received a lot of attention from film snobs around the world, but your average movie-goer should just skip this one. 

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 25, 2015
Director: Peter Landesman
Stars: Will Smith, Gugu Mbatha-Raw
Plot: A doctor discovers a disease that may bring down the NFL

Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters

Will Smith has given us a thinking-person's blockbuster. This movie is done in a way that it will satisfy both the casual movie-goer and the person looking for something deep and meaningful in their theatrical experience.

I'm not sure how true to the real story this film stays, but it is fascinating to see one man take on one of the world's largest businesses. His journey is compelling, frustrating and intense. You can tell that his character feels passionate about trying to save lives no matter what the personal cost to himself or his profession.

I would like to know if the NFL had any editorial say in this film. There are several scenes that make them look bad, but the film uses real NFL logos and stadiums so it makes me think that they may have had some input into the final cut. I hope not, but that remains to be seen.

This is not a happy, fun, popcorn flick. It is a powerful, moving film that is worth the time and money.

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 25, 2015
Director: Sean Anders
Stars: Will Ferrell, Mark Wahlberg
Plot: A dad and step-dad have a battle to try to win the affections of their children

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD and make someone else rent it

The Ferrell/Wahlberg combination is either incredible or a complete disaster. This movie, unfortunately, is the later. It's obnoxious, whiny, slow, and barely funny. I saw it in a theater with about 20 other people and I heard half a dozen laughs at most.

Most of the best lines and scenes from the movie are in the trailer, and a couple of good ones in the trailer didn't make it into the movie.

This film is full of cliches and stereotypes and the situations are unbelievable and forced.

This movie owes a big "Thank You" to STAR WARS because the only way it is making money is by people not able to see STAR WARS because it is sold out and opting to see this instead.

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 25, 2015
Director: David O. Russell
Stars: Jennifer Lawrence, Bradley Cooper, Robert De Niro
Plot: A woman that has put off her own life for everyone else finally has a plan to make something of herself

Clint Says: Save some money and see a matinee

I enjoyed this movie, but I wish it would have been better. I love the Lawrence/Cooper/De Niro crew, but this film doesn't quite capture the magic that we have seen from them in their other endeavors. I'm sure this movie will be nominated for, and win, several awards, but I'm not sure that it should.

The trailer leads one to believe that Joy is a savvy, go-getter that refuses to let nothing stand in her way, and while she eventually gets there, she spends the first half of the film dealing with everyone else's issues. It's important to the plot, but it could have been handled in a few minutes so we could move on to the good stuff quicker.

JOY has been slotted into the Comedy category, but the laughs are few. It's much more of a drama. Also, one of the things that makes these films so good is the rapport and banter between Lawrence and Cooper. We don't get nearly enough of that because, he's in the movie for all of about 10 minutes.

Like I said, I enjoyed this movie, and you probably will to, but it won't be a favorite for many people. You'd be better off just waiting for the DVD or seeing a matinee.

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 25, 2015
Director: Ericson Core
Stars: Luke Bracey, Edgar Ramirez, Ray Winstone
Plot: An FBI agent infiltrates a gang of extreme sports athletes on a massive crime spree

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD and make someone else rent it

I'm not really sure how you can make a movie about extreme sports, high stakes robberies, and undercover FBI work boring, but director Ericson Core managed to do it in spectacularly boring fashion.

There are so many eye-rolling moments in this film that I felt like I was doing my own back flips and stunts. The bad guys' motivation is flimsy at best, and Luke Bracey's incredible lack of acting skills makes Keanu Reeves look like he should have won an Oscar for the original POINT BREAK.

If I'm ever forced to watch this move again I may have to consider jumping off a cliff as an alternative...parachute optional.

Rated: R
Release Date: December 25, 2015
Director: Quentin Tarantino
Stars: Kurt Russell, Samuel L. Jackson, Jennifer Jason Leigh
Plot: Eight people from different walks of life end up trapped together in a blizzard when everything goes bad

Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters

I really believe that when Quentin Tarantino sat down to write this screenplay he had just seen the movie CLUE (1985) and said, "I can do that movie way better. And with a ton more violence and bad language. And in the wild west."

Tarantino once again relies on the stellar talent of many of his go-to actors, and they pull off quite the epic flick. That said, this is a 3-plus hour long, Quentin Tarantino film. If either of those things bothers you do not go see this film.

You should also avoid this movie if you are easily offended by bad language, including the constant use of the N word, you do not like gratuitous violence, or you aren't a fan of Shakespearean-style tragedies.

You should drop everything and go see this movie now if you are a Quentin Tarantino fan, because this is some of his finest work since PULP FICTION. You should also see it if you love intriguing mysteries, scenes where you can cut the tension with a knife, and crazy twists that you will never see coming.

This film is long, over the top, ridiculous, and amazing. If you can handle it I highly recommend seeing it.

NOTE: Tarantino filmed this movie in the style of the old road show films. If you have a chance to see it in the road show fashion, I recommend it. It's odd compared to today's movies, but it is interesting. You'll feel like you are getting punked for the first ten minutes of the film, but then it kicks in, and it moves at light speed after the intermission.

Wednesday, December 16, 2015


Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 18, 2015
Director: J.J. Abrams
Stars: Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Harrison Ford, Adam Driver
Plot: A small band of rebels must fight the growing power of The First Order or be destroyed

Clint Says: Drop everything and go see this movie now

********NO SPOILERS********
********JUST MY REVIEW*********

The first film I ever saw in theaters was STAR WARS: A NEW HOPE (4). From that moment on I was hooked. I was a STAR WARS fan for life. Then came Episodes 1 - 3 and I briefly considered joining the Dark Side. Then about two years ago I heard that J.J. Abrams was going to make a new STAR WARS. I am a huge J.J. Abrams fan, and what he did with STAR TREK was nothing short of amazing, so I waited, agonizingly, for two years until Tuesday December 16, 2015 when I finally got to see EPISODE VII.

Ladies and gentlemen, I bounced in my chair like a giddy little school boy for two hours and ten minutes. I clapped, I cheered, I cried, and I grabbed the people sitting beside me when things went to a J.J.Abrams level of crazy.

Simply put, this movie is spectacular. It is the STAR WARS movie I have waited 30 years to see. It feels like the original trilogy, but done in a modern way. The story is interesting, the characters are compelling and believable.

Dear readers, you are going to completely fall in love with Daisy Ridley in the first ten minutes of the movie. She is going to be a massive Hollywood star.

One word of warning, there are MAJOR plot points that many inconsiderate people out there will begin publishing on social media very soon. You really need to avoid all of that to enjoy this movie thoroughly. I suggest buying tickets to see it as soon as possible and also avoiding the internet as much as your life will allow.

The Force is strong with this one.

Rated: R
Release Date: December 18, 2015
Director: Jason Moore
Stars: Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, Ike Barinholtz
Plot: Two middle-aged sisters throw an epic bash at their family home before their parents can sell it

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD

Here's the deal. If you are putting your movie up against STAR WARS 7 you are basically saying, "We know this film isn't great and we are fine with losing." I'm not saying this is a horrible film, but it's one that will easily be forgotten.

Poehler and Fey are very funny throughout this raunchy and f-bomb filled comedy, but the script is exceedingly juvenile and boring. There is nothing in this film that we haven't seen before dozens of times.

If you are looking for a few good R-rated laughs this weekend, SISTERS will most likely satisfy, but don't expect it to be one that you'll be excited to tell your friends you saw.

Rated: PG
Release Date: December 18, 2015
Director: Walt Becker
Stars: Jason Lee, Bella Thorne
Plot: The chipmunks embark on a road trip to stop Dave from proposing to his girlfriend

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD

This is one of those films that you know exactly what it is going to be before you see it. That said, I thought the physical comedy was funny and everything else was on some level of tolerable. The movie offers nothing that makes it worth seeing in theaters, but it will be worth a rental when it comes out on DVD.

That's my take on it. My five year old daughter, who is a much harsher critic than I could ever be, said this about the movie. "It's waaaayyyyy too long and it's BORING!"

Since the movie is targeted for someone a lot closer to her age than to mine you may want to take her word for it.

Thursday, December 10, 2015

Movie Review For December 11, 2015: LEGEND and IN THE HEART OF THE SEA

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 11, 2015
Director: Ron Howard
Stars: Chris Hemsworth, Brendan Gleeson, Benjamin Walker, Cillian Murphy
Plot: A group of whalers meet their match in the form of a massive whale that is trying to demolish their ship

Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters

Director Ron Howard has a knack for giving audiences epic films to experience. This movie is no exception. The action is powerful, the cinematography is stunning, and the story is compelling and told well.

While this movie is a dark horse in the awards race this year, it would not surprise me to see it nominated in several technical categories as well as visual effects. If it ends up getting any acting nominations it would most likely be for Brendan Gleeson. He gives an impressive and emotional performance.

If you like epic sea tales, you will love this movie. If a 19th century yarn about a big, mean whale sounds boring to you, you should probably skip this movie.

Rated: R
Release Date: November 20, 2015
Director: Brian Helgeland
Stars: Tom Hardy, Emily Browning
Plot: Two brothers control the British underground with their brains and brawn

Clint Says: Save some money and see a matinee

Tom Hardy has quickly risen in the ranks to one of the best go-to guys in Hollywood. In LEGEND he plays both of the Kray brothers and does an amazing job.

This is an interesting, period-piece, gangster flick that will have you laughing, cheering, cringing, and covering your eyes. I'm not sure how close this movie stays to the true story, but if the real story is even half of what the movie portrays one would be wise to not cross the Krays.

This is not a film for those with a weak heart or stomach, it is full of gangster violence and all of the hard things that go along with that lifestyle. That said, it also has very compelling relationship stories between the brothers others in their lives.

This movie isn't going to win any of the big awards this year, nor will it be nominated for many, but it's still a film worth seeing if you are looking for a good gangster flick this weekend.

Thursday, December 3, 2015

Movie Reviews For December 4, 2015: KRAMPUS and THE LETTERS

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: December 4, 2015
Director: Michael Dougherty
Stars: Adam Scott, Toni Collette, David Koechner
Plot: The Anti-Santa demon, Krampus, is accidentally summoned and terrorizes a family

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD and make someone else rent it

This film is an utter waste of time. It's not scary, it's not entertaining, and the ending is so ridiculous that it will be nearly impossible for you to not hear some variation of "What the...?" from other viewers.

KRAMPUS is full of plot holes, lame dialogue, and horrific acting. I would rather spend all of the holidays with people I can't stand then have to watch this travesty again.

Put this one on your naughty list.

Rated: PG
Release Date: December 4, 2015
Director: William Riead
Stars: Juliet Stevenson, Rutger Hauer, Max Von Sydow
Plot: During her life, Mother Teresa corresponded with many people through letters, this film looks at her work through those letters

Clint Says: See this movie in theaters if you can find it

Even though this film is slow, the story is so compelling and inspiring that it makes it a joy to watch. If you already know about the work that Mother Teresa did you will find this new angle of information on her life to be quite intriguing. If you are not familiar with the things she accomplished in her lifetime you will be astounded.

While I wouldn't take younger children to see this movie, simply because they will get bored, I would encourage anyone with children from age 10 on up to take them to see this film. It is a wonderful catalyst to talk with them about selfless giving, equality and struggle.

Juliette Stevenson's portrayal of Mother Teresa is spectacular. She shows us the strength, compassion, humility and courage that embodied the life of one of this world's greatest servants.

I don't know if this film will catch the eye of The Academy, but it is worthy of many awards this year.

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Movie Reviews November 25, 2015: CREED, THE GOOD DINOSAUR, and VICTOR FRANKENSTEIN

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: Nivember 25, 2015
Director: Ryan Coogler
Stars: Michael B. Jordan, Sylvester Stallone, Tessa Thompson
Plot: The son of Apollo Creed tries to make a name for himself in the boxing world, but his legendary father is always lurking

Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters

This is a ROCKY for a new generation. It is powerful, emotional and most importantly, it's a good film.

The movie went a lot deeper than I expected it to go. It got down inside the main characters so we could really understand their strengths, flaws, and motivations.The performances by all of the main players were great. Not quite award-worthy, but still fine acting all around.

There are several predictable and cliche moments throughout the movie, but those can easily be pushed aside since the entirety of the film is so well done.

And, in true ROCKY fashion, they did leave it open for the possibility of a sequel.

Rated: PG
Release Date: November 25, 2015
Director: Peter Sohn
Stars: Raymond Ochoa, Frances McDormand, Jeffrey Wright
Plot: A young boy and a dinosaur become friends on a long journey

Clint Says: Wait for the DVD

This film is a swing and a miss for Pixar. It is really slow, even though it's only 90 minutes long it feels like it's well over 2 hours. There are very few light-hearted or funny moments. And while this isn't a funny film per se, we have come to expect a lot of laughs from Pixar movies.

The film is rated PG and I wouldn't take anyone under age 5 because there are several very scary moments. Also, the film just isn't good enough to hold the attention of the younger kids.

This movie has very little to offer adults, which is quite disappointing. Usually Pixar films are great for all ages. This one will appeal to children that are 8-10 years old and that's about it.

There are some other family films coming out in the near future that look like they would be worth your theater money. I say save it for those films and just rent this one when the DVD is finally released.

Warning: The animated short before THE GOOD DINOSAUR is terrifying. I know that if my five year old saw it she would have nightmares. Just be aware going into the movie that bad dreams are a possibility.

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: November 25, 2015
Director: Paul McGuigan
Stars: James McAvoy, Daniel Radcliffe, Andrew Scott
Plot: Two brilliant scientists create life from death while Scotland Yard tries to stop them

Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters.

The trailer for this movie had me chomping at the bit to see it. I was really hoping that it would live up to the expectations that I had from the trailer, and it did.

It has a great plot with an especially fascinating origin story for Igor, and the Gothic cinematography is outstanding. McAvoy and Radcliffe have incredible chemistry making the movie even more fun to watch.

This film is nerdtastic all the way through with the science and experiments. It is also quite scary and intense in places. Most people wouldn't consider this a horror film by today's standards, but I would say this is exactly what a true horror film should be.

NOTE: For those of you that are fans of the BBC show SHERLOCK, you'll have fun watching Moriarty play Sherlock for a while.

Thursday, November 19, 2015


Rated: PG-13
Release Date: November 20, 2015
Director: Francis Lawrence
Stars: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Donald Sutherland, Liam Hemsworth
Plot: Katniss and the rebels devise a plan to take down the Capitol and President Snow

Clint Says: Drop everything and go see this movie now

Simply put, this film is outstanding. It is a perfect ending to an incredible franchise. I walked out of the theater with so many emotions. I was happy because the movie was so good. I was sad because there are several very emotional and intense scenes that will wreck you and leave you raw. And I felt loss knowing that this will be the last time I will get to experience something new from this world.

While the acting throughout the series has been great, in this movie the actors went to another level of greatness. There is a possibility that we might see Josh Hutcherson up for a few awards.

MOCKINGJAY Part 2 will leave you breathless. For nearly the entire 2 1/2 hours you finally think you are going to be able to catch your breath for a moment then something else happens making you jump out of your chair and holding your breath even longer.

Grab your friends and head to the theaters now. Then, once you've all recovered, go do it again.

One word of warning. It is imperative that you see Part 1 before seeing Part 2. If you haven't seen it you will be completely lost from the first scene. The move starts where Part 1 left off almost as if it is just a jump cut to the next scene.

Rated: R
Release Date: November 20, 2015
Director: Jonathan Levine
Stars: Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Seth Rogen, Anthony Mackie
Plot: Three buddies spend Christmas Eve looking for an epic Christmas party.

Clint Says: Save some money and see a matinee

This is one of those films where you know going into it you are going to see stupid, raunchy humor throughout, hilarious cameos, and a heartwarming finish. It's also a film that affords you the luxury of being able to turn your brain off for 90 minutes.

There is nothing about this movie that is great. There is nothing about this movie that makes it worth seeing in theaters. It's stupid, childish, obnoxious and annoying. That said, if you are looking for a fun, brainless, laugh-out-loud night with friends this movie will not disappoint.

While it isn't the best work for most of the actors, I must say that this is probably Miley Cyrus's greatest moment to date.

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: November 20, 2015
Director: Billy Ray
Stars: Chiwetel Ejiofor, Nicole Kidman, Julia Roberts
Plot: A group of investigators' lives are changed when the daughter of one of their own is murdered

Clint Says: Wait until after opening weekend, but see this in theaters

If you are in the mood for a well done, suspenseful thriller this week then you need to see this movie. The acting is great, the plot is incredible, and the twists are stunning.

The only thing that really bothered me about this movie was that it switches back and forth between 2001 and 2015, but the characters are the same, so sometimes it is confusing as to which year we are in.Other than that, this is a film that will sit in your brain for days.

Julia Roberts plays the slightly creepy, plain Jane cop very well, and her turning point scene will wreck you. There may be a couple of award nominations in her future. The rest of the cast does a fine job, but Roberts is the stand out.

Rated: R
Release Date: November 20, 2015
Director: Angelina Jolie
Stars: Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt
Plot: An estranged couple tries to rekindle their relationship in a French, sea-side hotel

Clint Says: Don't even bother

I have to give Angelina Jolie credit for being ambitious. She wrote, directed and starred in BY THE SEA and she did it all in an interesting throwback homage to the glamour films of the 60's and 70's. That said, this film is horrible.

There are three things I really can't stand in movies. One is a slow-moving plot in a 2-plus hour long movie, another is a highly anticipated reveal that turns out to be a complete letdown, and another is Brad Pitt eating. This film strikes out in all three categories.

It is dreadfully slow and boring. The film could have easily been edited down by 45 minutes and still accomplished the same thing. We spend more that two hours catching glimpses of the horrific event that has caused this couple so much strife for so long only to find out in the last 10 minutes that the horrific event, while tragic, is something that millions of people go through every year and are able to carry on with their lives in an all, but normal fashion. It's actually quite offensive to those people that have dealt with the same thing. And finally, Brad Pitt's eating is nauseating. How anyone can watch him scoop, and chomp and smack and stuff like that is beyond me.

I honestly can't see how anyone could walk out of the theater after seeing this movie and be able to say that it was a good film.

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Movie Reviews For November 13, 2015: LOVE THE COOPERS and THE 33

Rated: PG-13
Release Date: November 13, 2015
Director: Jessie Nelson
Stars: Diane Keaton, John Goodman, Ed Helms, Olivia Wilde
Plot: A Christmas family gathering makes them all take a new look at family bonds

Clint Says: Don't even bother

To quote another Christmas movie, LOVE THE COOPERS sits on a throne of lies! This film has been marketed through the trailers as a fun holiday comedy. The truth? It's a sad, depressing, shallow movie that tries to redeem itself with three minutes of Christmas magic at the end.

The ensemble cast is great, and this may be Olivia Wilde's best work, but the plot is so terrible that their performances are overshadowed. 

If you are looking for a movie to get you into the Christmas spirit, stay far away from this one. The only gift this movie gives you is when the end credits finally roll.

THE 33
Rated: PG-13
Release Date: November 13, 2015
Director: Patricia Riggen
Stars: Antonio Banderas, Rodrigo Santoro, Juliette Binoche
Plot: Based on the true story of the 33 Chilean miners trapped in a mine for 69 days

Clint Says: Save some money and see a matinee

In the Fall of 2010 we all sat glued to TV screens desperately hoping we would see the first miner come up through a small hole in the ground. When he finally did, you could almost hear the whole world cheering as one. No movie could ever recreate the sense of drama and intensity of that moment, but this film comes close.

It is impossible to imagine what life would be like living, for 69 days, under a rock that could shift and kill you at any second. The stress and fear must have been all but unbearable. We get to see some of that in this movie, but there are so many stories that the director tried to get in that we never really get to go deep into any of them.

The same can be said for the stories of the families waiting for their loved ones to be rescued and the rescuers. We get to see bits and pieces of a lot of stories, but we are never given enough to really care about individuals. Thankfully the story is so compelling itself that it makes the movie worth watching.

If you are looking for a dramatic and inspirational story, you will find THE 33 satisfactory.