I watch crappy movies so you don't have to.

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Movie Review for May 30, 2014

MALEFICENT
Rated PG
Stars: Angelina Jolie, Elle Fanning
Plot: The untold story of how Maleficent came to be and the story behind the story of Sleeping Beauty is finally revealed.
Trailer

Clint Says: Drop everything and go see this movie now


Unlike many film critics, I am a sucker for a good Disney flick, so walking in to see MALEFICENT I had high hopes that it would live up to the incredible trailers and that the story they chose for her would be worthy of a film of this magnitude. My high hopes were met with an astoundingly epic movie that was suspenseful, charming, and funny.

Kudos to the special effects team. If they aren't nominated for an OSCAR there is something wrong in Hollywood. The creatures' texture and movement is as close to real as I have ever seen in a movie. Their attention to detail was so precise that you almost feel like you can reach out and touch the scenery.

Angelina Jolie puts the entire cast and crew on her back and carries them all to the finish. She is Maleficent, and if you aren't completely enamored with her by the end of the film we probably need to break up. As for the secondary characters (read: everybody but Angelina), they do a fine job of supporting Jolie without getting in the way of her stellar performance.

My only beef with this film are two gaping plot holes near the end that are obvious enough that even casual movie-goers will most-likely notice them. Aside from that though, MALEFICENT may be the best movie of the year so far. (An award it will lose next week).




A MILLION WAYS TO DIE IN THE WEST
Rated: R
Stars: Seth MacFarlane, Charlize Theron. Liam Neeson
Plot: A meek farmer must stand up to a rough cowboy to fight for the woman he loves.
Trailer

Clint Says: Don't even bother


If you are in the mood for a completely mindless, boring, useless flick full of juvenile humor this film will still disappoint you. I can't stress enough how bad this movie is. Seth MacFarlane wrote, directed, produced and starred in it, and apparently he didn't have anyone around him willing to tell him "no".

MacFarlane must have compromising pictures of Liam Neeson and Charlize Theron or they owe him a huge debt. Those are the only plausible explanations as to why they would be in a horrific train-wreck of a movie like this.

On the plus side, I will admit that there are a couple of good laughs in this flick, but only a couple. And having to sit through almost two hours of clichéd crap for two or three laughs is painful at best.

The best thing about A MILLION WAYS TO DIE IN THE WEST is that it is so bad there is zero chance we will have to see Seth MacFarlane screwing up the OSCARS again.



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