I watch crappy movies so you don't have to.

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Movie Review For March 27, 2015

Rated: PG
Stars: Jim Parsons, Rihanna
Plot: A young girl and an outcast alien try to find her mom and save the world before it is too late

Clint Says: See this after opening weekend, if you have younger kids

This is basically an inter-species, intergalactic road trip flick that will keep you smiling for 90 minutes.

This is the kind of movie that is really good, but it could have been so much more. I enjoyed it and the children in the theater were all very excited about it, but it didn't have that over-the-top experience like some of the other great Dreamworks projects, (SHREK, HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON, etc.)

It is a funny, caring, somewhat suspenseful, and unique movie that would make for a fun outing with the whole family, but don't expect this one to become the movie that spends three months in the DVD player.

There are a couple of scary scenes that may be too intense for the under 5 crowd, but everyone else should have a good time.

Rated: R
Stars: Will Ferrell, Kevin Hart, TI
Plot: A wealthy businessman hires a guy to teach him how to survive prison after he's convicted of fraud

Clint Says: See this in theaters after opening weekend if you can handle the raunch

This is the funniest and also raunchiest movie I've seen so far in 2015. There were several moments where we were all laughing so hard that we missed the next line in the film. There were also moments where we were audibly cringing so loud at the raunchiness that we missed entire scenes of dialogue.

Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart play well to each other's strengths and have great comedic chemistry. I was also pleasantly surprised at how well TI can act. A warning though on Ferrell's performance... Once again we see way too much of him.

The plot is actually quite compelling for a comedy and there is a good amount of suspense to keep this from being a paper-thin, one-dimensional film.

If you are looking to guffaw this weekend this is your movie, but if you don't do well with raunchy humor you need to stay far away from this flick.

Rated: R
Stars: Maika Monroe, Keir Gilchrist
Plot: A girl is continuously followed by an evil being after a date goes wrong.

Clint Says: Don't even bother

Imagine you sleep with someone and they give you an STD, but instead of this STD living inside your body and causing problems it is a really ticked off ghost that wants to kill you. Oh, and this angry ghost/STD hybrid can only walk, but it knows where you are and walks toward you all the time. If you can actually dumb your brain down enough to imagine that then you've basically seen IT FOLLOWS.

Horror films aren't usually known for their acting, but this flick takes bad acting to a whole new level of suck. Throw on top of that the fact that this is supposed to be a horror flick, but it isn't even remotely scary. And it's so dumb and poorly done that you can't even laugh at the stupidity of it all.

Not only is the acting and overall movie bad, but the musical score is one of the worst I've ever heard. It sounds like it was recorded on a kid's Casio synthesizer from the early 1980s.

I can easily judge how scary a movie is by how many people have their phones out in the theater and how many people go to the restroom during the movie. The more phones and the more bathroom breaks the scarier the film. I'm sure it's people trying to distract themselves from the scary. This movie? I didn't see a single phone nor did anyone leave to use the bathroom. I was surprised however that nobody just left and didn't come back.

If this movie wasn't bad enough already, the director also thought it was necessary for us to have to see some old dude's junk. I'm not spoiling anything here, believe me, that thing was spoiled a long time ago. I mean, honestly, put it away.

I can't believe I'm saying this again in another review, but it just fits too perfectly not to... Avoid this movie like you would an STD.

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